Everyone needs a crazy friend. I have more than one, but the craziest of the crazy we just call Crazy Mike. He’s an outstanding comedian, and a highly trained martial artist that knows about 15 ways to kill a man with his bare hands. Crazy friends like that are good for keeping you from doing stupid shit you shouldn’t be doing in the first place. I asked Mike to break my legs if I contacted a particular person, and he agreed. So even though I’ve wanted to numerous times, even gone so far as to write a letter to them, I can’t send it without his permission, because I know he’s crazy enough to follow through on his promise. Want to lose weight? Ask your crazy friend to key your car if you screw up on your diet. Want to quit smoking? Ask your crazy friend to shit on your carpet if you smoke another cigarette. That’s why we have crazy friends.

Since the DVD for Land of the Dead, an amazing movie (one of the best I’ve seen in a looooooong time), just came out, here’s a scanned picture of a piece of zombie art that a girl I used to date made for me on my birthday. It’s awesome- I had to put it up on a shelf in my closet, though, or I’d get all sad looking at it. It’s a great piece of art from a very talented individual.

This is the first blog post I’ll be announcing on myspace.com, so if anyone out there is on myspace, and you don’t have me as a friend, go to www.myspace.com/funnymatt and add me.

I was listening to a song someone sent me a while ago by Fiona Apple- that chick is pretty cool, but I have no idea what her point is when she’s singing about stuff. Is she sad? She sounds so angry that I can never tell if she’s mad at herself, or at the guys she’s singing about. But Criminal and Shadowboxer are great songs. I’ll ask my friend Nacy- he likes gay music, so he should know. Anyone that listenes to Belle and Sebastian and claims it’s great should know the answer to that.